Game Title - Rumble Massage
Developer - Justin Le Clair
Genre - Massage
Rating - M
Players: 1-2
Release Date - February 2009, sometime this week
Platforms-Xbox 360
Rumble Massage is a game I came across one lonely, cold night whilst searching the Xbox Live marketplace. Curious to see if my beloved Dishwasher: Dead Samurai had finally made it on to the Community Games section, I explored this rather shit filled section of the New Xbox Experience. As I trudged onwards through the muck I happened to have m eye catch a certain game, it's title rather odd and set up rather kinky, I downloaded it.
Rumble Massage! A seemingly harmless game that promises to "ease your muscles after 18 hours of gaming". But a rather innocent cover is only a muse for the sexuality that is waiting within.
For you see, Justin Le Clair finally grasped a basic male logic of gaming. He finally understood the REASON of the Rumble Pack. It was never meant to enhance the experience of gaming. Rumble was not invented to really FEEL the bullets pounding the concrete cover. No. It was made to be placed upon your cock.
We've all done it, and some companies even marketed it. Anyone remember how a Mad Catz controller would rumble significantly harder then a standard controller? Oh yes, they knew. They knew.
The game is very easily played, simple hold down the Y button until the meter is maxed out and and then place the controller firmly on the balls.
As easy as it is for men to enjoy, woman can easily enjoy it too.
1. Audio:7/10 The game does not have that many sound effects, infact it doesn't have any at all. The rumble is all there is..and all it needs.
2. Graphics:2/10 A very simple graphic of a chart with a pin.
3. Controls:10/0 Y to speed up, A to slow down.
4. Content:10/10 Although only one game type, it's a very, very good game type.
5. Replayability:11/10 You'll keep coming back. Albeit offline.
6. Realism:10/10 These orgasms are NOT faked.
7. Getting Into It:10/10 RUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
8. Innovation:10/10 Finally a game grasping rumble at it's real purpose.
9. Game Length:10/10 Lasts as long as you need.
10. Options:3/10 Not to many options besides the speed and intensity of the rumble.
*Don't ban please :[
